You may not know the name used in psychology, but probably you definitely know a person who is very charming to the world and toxic to their own spouse or family. They might be a narcissistic person. Although the word is used casually to mean a self-absorbed person, in psychology, it comprises a constellation of traits.
The narcissistic person causes a lot of hurt and even psychological trauma to their family members, especially to a spouse. The way they ill-treat their spouses or significant other has a specific pattern. If you are a victim of narcissistic abuse, you will have an a-ha moment by just reading up on the patterns. It is very important to equip yourself with this knowledge, without which you cannot protect yourself or heal from the abuse.
I highly recommend all the videos of Dr. Ramani if you want to understand narcissism or are trying to deal with a person in your life with narcissistic personality.
This is a video by Dr. Ramani explaining "gaslighting". Everyone should be aware of this strategy used by many manipulative and abusive people, whether they are narcissistic or not.
In this TEDx talk, Dr. Ramani talks about how the modern society is encouraging narcissistic people, normalizing their abuse, and even applauding them for their negative traits.
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